相信是最好的等待！

选择了的路就要走下去，要相信暴风雨后就会出现彩虹， 既然已经跌落谷底了，还能再跌吗？那，就是反弹的时候了。相信是最好的等待！

我会有明白的一天的，我相信总有一天我会放下， 不再在乎了。我很在乎亲情，出外升学，与妹妹们的感情逐渐疏远，自以为引用这半年这时间来 ‘抢救’ ，可以找回昔日我们姐妹们一起嬉戏的憧憬，看来这些已成过去。

我以为用真心对待可以换来亲情，原来原因才是重要。关键是，问题到底出现在那儿? 我努力想尽各种办法问候，帮忙打扫家务，电脑坏了，马上维修；却换来，我是有私心的。我有私心？怎么私心了？电脑不是都你们在用吗？我只是要寄报告给老师， 你们也讽刺说我故意等你们要用电脑是霸占它，我要如何霸占了，我六点才放工，琐碎事做完了，八点才有空，我又怎么知道你们几时跟朋友有电动游戏约呢？

原以为会想家的我，想念家的感觉会很折腾，万万都没有想到，想家的痛苦远远不及失望，委屈，心碎的苦还让人难受。每个人都说我最幸福了可以住在家，吃家里的，用家里的，可是如果你们知道还要看妹妹们的脸色委屈的求存，你们还会羡慕我吗？

由于我的适应能力差，工作程序还没完全掌握，更不用说与人与人之间的沟通了。虽然用了两个月的时间慢慢适应他们的沟通方式，我还是会继续加油的。我已经努力过了，要是失败，我才不会后悔。这条路是我选的， 我会笑着接受这一切， 让它变得有价值。我相信这些也是我生活上的训练。

How to manage negative emotional?

I just realised this is the only Sunday i have my own time, i can say i free until i dunno what to do. Flash back what i have done for all past weekends since my internship begin, it is either im together with KP or shopping at Malacca or go travelling or travelling to KL and so on. Ya, i have been passing through all those busy weekends yet im enjoying it very much. I have adapted that busy life, busy weekends. Although Im busy and i used to complaint but I feel happy, satisfy and substantial, at least i feel like im full of energy to do anything, housechores, revision, audit file. Ok, when i really sit down and rest, i feel so empty and lonely. You guys can get better understanding by checking on how many blogs i have been compose today.

For the past few months, im been busying on adapting my intern life, home staying life, time management with KP, friends, colleagues and so on. Ya, i admit that im still adapting this kinds of life. Many of them will ask me, isn't that im staying at my own hometown, how come i still need time to adapt my used life? Ya, this questions hits me too. Althougj i keep my things properly in my room, i will still need to look for it by using the min 1 hour and max few days to recall where i kept my stuff. And this situation continues until today, some stuff i have yet to find it. What's going on now? How come my STML (Short-Term-Memory-Loss) become FML (Forever-Memory-Loss)? Is it really the sign that i still couldn't adapt my life or i have some other things in my mind to be bother with/has been haunted me which still unknown to me? Who has the answer for me, .........................nobody but i am.

Although i have been haunted by negative emotional especially during certain period, I will get agitated immediately until it reach the uncontrollable limit but im now learning on how to look at the bright side.

First avoid from becoming friend with negative emotional:

• Think before i yell
• Think before i speak
• Think of another side of each matter (bright side)
• Think positively

Second keep yourself closer to positive emotional and thinking:

• Relax yourself no matter how busy you are
• Take a short nap in the afternoon
• Keep your place clean and tidy
• Keep yourself healthy by taking regular meal, vitamin c, herbal tea, herbal jelly, herbal drinks, green tea, fruits, vegetable and so on
• Write down your feeling without keeping them inside
• Release the negative feeling by using the right way
• Bear in mind, you can only plan to manage your time, dun force yourself to follow what has been planned
• Bear in mind also you can only control your own living style
• Set a reachable target to fulfill
• Get some more interest and dreams to fill up your time
• Accept the things where you think no harm accepting them
• Relax

Random

Hi, i'm back again for my blog'ing session after getting my work done as well as my weekly report. As for weekly report, not that im very hardworking to get the report updated every week, just that i have some sort of 'illness' called STML, for those who doesn't know this abbreviation, STML stand for Short Term Memory Loss. If that happens, what happening during that week will be blank for me, unless i fill in according as what i wish if not i shall blank the report for that week.

As for the work i refer to is because i was told to make some adjustment at about 5.45pm which is 15 minutes left to 6pm, how am i suppose to finish it in 15 minutes and no computer was available at the same time, furthermore, i will have to make it done on Monday morning and discuss with Seniors before the arrival of client. No choices, i have to make it done as it is my responsibility to make it done on time. That's why i don't mind it 'interrupt' some of my resting time.

Today, after being a good daughter for my parents by accompanying them for breakfast, i went to shop some necessities, fetch KP to bus stand, blogging. Besides, i manage to meet with my best friend, Winnie, who is going back to West Lafayette this coming Thursday. She is still as confident as she used to be. Although she come back for 3 months holidays, but she never bother to rest more than one week, she is so wiiling to go for the holiday work at KL, and she travel to KL by herself and drive car in Malaysia which she has stop doing that for few years since she study overboard. Ok i do understand that she did drive in Indiana, the thing is the driver seat is at left hand side at westerm country. * clap *

I can see she is far more independent, confidence, different and adventurous than before. The difference here refer to good improvement which i almost look forward to them to happen on me and which are always fail to. Im not independent, self-confidence and also the adventorous enough lo. My friends who know me well will understand i will never dare to try someting new to me, especially the things i never get to see, eat or drink and so on, example: aubergine, capsicum.

p/s:When can i be more confidence, adventurous and indepedent for those who i care?

Dear's convocation 2009 #2

KP and his family

Finally, i manage to transfer all my bf's grad photo from MY digital camera. How come? In facts it is just because of Im slacking around without make it done on time since there is no deadlines. Ya , i think i should make myself a deadline for anything.

We all have to woke up at around 4am to get ourselves prepared to Cyberjaya-MMU campus and we depart from Malacca at around 5am. At around 6.58am, we passed through cyberjaya toll, that also mean we manage to get 10% discount for toll receipt. We have to parked the car outside out the campus as the management only prepare one car park for each invitation/fresh grad. At this time, i really hate myself being wearing my high heel walking and approching to the grand hall. Omg, can you imagine i am wearing the high heel and walk or i can say climb up the declivity? Of course, my legs pain like hell until they become numb.

Ok, let's go back to the main topic. The ceremony started at 8.15am, although im unable to enter the grand hall, but i was lead to another lecturer hall to watch the ceremony through LCD. The opening ceremony like usual, so no comment, the main contents you can imagine all fresh grad's names were called up one by one......and it continues until 12pm. Ya, is 12pm. The ceremony ended with the mmu grad's songs - Permata Dunia. To be frank, i like this songs, when i first listen to this songs, it makes me swear that i must listen to this songs during my grad ceremony.

Here are the bouquets from my mum and his mum

After the ceremony, i did not really busying on taking photo first as i still need to look for bf and his family upside down of the mmu compound. Finally, we take photos around of the campus and outside of the grand hall together with uncle, aunty and bf. Furthermore, i also manage to take photo with Huiyin , Sinyi, Chin Ting, Pei San, Kia Jui, Edith, Pei Fen, Kwee Fong and a lot of them (pls forgive for those i did not mentioned their names here cause i do have short-term-memory-loss nowadays)

KP & i Sinyi & i Chin Ting & i Kia Jui, Edith & i Pei San & i Pei Fen, Her Bf, KP & i

p/s: congrats to those who grad for the year 2009

Dear's convocation 2009, congrats dear!

Yesterday was Singapore's National Day and also dear's convocation ceremony. Congrats dear, that you have pass through all obstacles and unfoseen circustances, I knew u have been endure all kinds of difficulties in order to celebrate the arriving of this important day.

No matter how, i believe this is just a starting point for you to enter another type of your life - career life. There is still a long way to go. I hope u can overcome all circumstances as you have done so far.

Congrats...

Wireless adapter installed!!

Hey, guys after struggling for so many months since i came back from Malacca for training. Finally i manage to get myself a wireless adapter for me to online in my room personally last Thursday. by using part of my own allowance. Yeah.......

Therefore, my blog won't be hibernate again provided Im won't turn on 'lazy' mood too often.

What is 'urgent'? Tell me!!!

When i finaly spare some time to open 'Music Rainbow' webpage, i just realised it has been such a long time i hinerbated my webpage andalso my lappiee.

Anyway, although my working hour is only from 8.30am till 6pm. I should have about 5 hours more to go till 11pm (my sleeping time), and at least 1 hour to update my blog right? However, if i still need to get myself available for house chores, some light exercise, some relaxing treatment and also some weekly report to be updated almost everyday. Maybe it can be understand why i have no time for myself at all.

When i start my working life (or i make it as training life), why must i specific it so precisely? Ya, is a must. Last time i was told training life is somehow different with working life and i still not understand with it? Isn't it working on almost same stuff in the office together with all colleagues? Now, i can differenciate the same thing d. If you were in working life, u work on your responsibility stuff; if you were just a trainee, u have to do ur stuff and together with other people's stuff. Eh, don't ever think that you were helpng the colleague cause he/she has too many things to do. No...no..no... he/she is definitely busy but busy with chatting. Then you can imagine, when u rushing like hell (cause u still have to work on ur own work and pass up on time), and they chatting happily , laugh front and back, but u can do nothing but just swallow all of your grievance into your tummy.

Not that i dont want to reject them, as a trainee you can't really said much. If you said, you have your own stuff to do, then they will answer you ' what are you busying with? Ah?! that one ah? not urgent one , my report is far more urgent than yours.......If this is a fact, i can still accpet it, but then, one and a half more hour to go, he/she will come to you and ask for your own report. ( i was like......ah? Your 'not urgent' word can only be delay for one a half hour?!

Protest? Mogok? (Haiz....do it when u have experience and become senior first la!)

p/s: i just wanna passed by and say hello, ended up a complaining story born.