Memorial Day

Memorial day of my late-paternal-grandfather is today.

Time flee, it has been already 4 years (if no mistaken) he left us.

Grandpa, i drove to USj last week, i passed by Nilai. Thinking of you have been 'stayed' there for few years d. Suddenly i miss you. I have so much little of memory between you and me in my memory disk. Maybe you were too busy to play with me when i was small. There is only one present left by you to me as encouragement gift - mountain bike for my UPSR flying colour.

May you rest in peace.

2 days CPA Workshop

Today is my 2nd day of CPA workshop. To be frank, i'm quite satisfied with my performance yesterday. At least i can feel like the class for Module 1,2,3 is revision for me. I do have confidence to carry forward this self confidence to my 2nd day workshop.

However, this confidence faded when i know i just 'losing' my best friend. I do admit that is my fault. Some incident happened, until i dunno how to handle it. Then my 'lagging' attitude suggest to put this aside and focus my approaching exam. But it seem like i fail to 'buy' time for this friendship. Ya, she mentioned...8 years...8 years d but we seem fail to keep it. In fact i blame myself for not settle this problem immediately. Thought time will heal it yet i fail to 'buy' it. What can i do? Can someone please tell me? Im so helpless.

I thought i have brought forward my confidence to my 2nd day workshop, sleepless night destroy my will. I failed to concentrate my focus on today's teaching. My day being haunted by 'storm cloud'. I know the lecturer is good in the sense that, he is indeed successfully convey his understanding to us. I can understand better with his explanation and given examples. Thought i do more exercise on Module 4 and 5, who knows my understanding for Module 4 and 5 doesn't deep enough to even answer multiple questions. I made a lot of mistakes.

Another good point for this lecturer is, he let us off by 4.15pm. Hurray, although it was just 45 minutes earlier, yet i can really feel like last time when im in uni life. Then i returned back to my aunt's house and start packing. Before i leave aunt's house, i so wish to hug my aunt. I wonder what happen also. In facts, this aunt wasn't very close to me but she is nice to me all these while. I feel gratitute to her kindness, although it was just providing me shelter for few night. But it was a nice and relax workshop+holiday. At last, i did not give her a hug before i leave. She stood at the door and see me leaving. This action make me feel warm and touching.

Achievement for the year!!

Guess where am i now?

I'm now reaching my aunt' s house at USJ. This is my first time driving alone to the house from Mlc. Ok, i understand a lot of you guys out there already experienced before this. Normally i will only come with him la, or with my family. So what i did was just sleeping for the whole journey without worrying anything.

This time, i have 2 days CPA workshop at Metropolitan College Subang Jaya, in order to familiar with the route and get myself mentally prepared. I choose to arrive USJ one day earlier.

My first mission for this trip is reaching my aunt house safely on time. Yeah ! i just done it. Ok next mission will be depart from aunt house to Metropolitan College safely and reach on time. To ensure my journey is smoothly enough, i memorised google map as well as using GPS on time.

Third mission is knowing route to Sunway Pyramid and forth, filled up my craving on fish paste soup. I found one near Jalan Cheras. However, based on information online, the name of shop is the same yet the address looked so different. I think this mission gonna failed very soon, unless i got one 'GPS' who really went there before.

别人有911，而我有611

自从611发生之后，我们就不再庆祝我们每一个月的11。

不知道是我的执著还是童话回忆的坚持，我自己也开始回避11。我们的感情是在1211萌芽，因此就有了，每一个月一同回味11的美丽回忆。刚开始，每一个月的11我们都会穿上情侣装，之后演变成，我们出门吃一餐好的来庆祝。要是我们各在身在异方，我们还会通电，互说祝福的话。这样的日子，维持了三年多。

自从611，我们没了庆祝11的执著。我们不再庆祝了。因为那不再只是我们幸福开始的回忆，还有紧紧跟着我阴影的追随。我很想摆脱那阴影的追逐，可是，四个月了，我没有一天有曾忘记过， 痛了的心，痛了又痛，伤了又伤，剩下的只是伤口还有疤痕。破碎的心，就像是打破的镜子， 就算排在一起，还是会有裂缝； 就算你硬把他们拼在一起，看到的也只是破碎的我们。

有话说，Friendship must never be buried under the weight of misunderstanding. 我们的事情跟误会么有关系，只是我需要时间接受唤醒我的阴影的你。这样多人之中， 你是其中一个最明白， 最懂我的人。你知道我讨厌什么，忌讳什么吧？可是为什么你还是要这样对我？！

我知道我不会康复了。我只能祈祷疤痕能早点变淡。至于你们，你们只是我这段阴影回忆的呼唤者。谭若你知道你是其中之一，请你暂时远离我的视线。我不想在我能够完全控制且掩饰我的情绪之前，对你不客气。

Study leave started !!!

My study leave starts and will last for 18 days, more exactly is 17 days as one of them is exam day.

Somehow, i was so demotivated. I gonna forced myself with some achievable target as well as rewards. Haha : )

Then i think it can work well gua. I hope so.

Wish me luck, guys : )

Mumbling

I rent a ROOM with a family which comprises of aunty and her son. during my working life at Malacca. Ok, i'm kind of contented because the house can keep clean as aunty will clean the house almost everyday ( i don't know as im not staying the house for 24 hours u see!)

Scenario 1:

Everytime i come back from Muar, sure i will bring along big bags , luggage. I myself also wonder what's happening. Am i moving house again? Ok of course not. I like my bag with full capacity = security. (maybe i lack of it)

When aunty saw me in big bags, she offered her help normally and NORMALLY i will replied 'never mind'

• A: wah, so many bags ah?
• P: Ya. (Crazy, far sighted meh? can't see ah? i just standing arbout 3 meter from her ok)
• A: Do u need my help?
• P: No thanks. ( I will be reaching my room by NOW if u didn't stop me)
• A: Tell u what, i went pasar malam just now.
• P: ah? pasar malam ? (but who cares)
• (whenever i try to stop her, she continue continue continue...what sold at pasar malam la, what she brought from pasar malam la)
• (Who care. Please, im with big bags u see, i know she notice it cause she did offer help, u see. Now she telling me something irrelevant and not-informative at all.)

When she was about to start another topic what she has done during the weekends....i stop her.

• P: Sorry for interrupting, aunty. I need to carry my big bags to my room.
• A: oh ok. ..

• P : @Speechless@

Scenario 2:

When i come back from working, i was exhausted, so i take rest at sofa, just sitting down there only. Aunty come over and ask concernly ' how r u?' Of course again, i will answered ' im ok, don't worry' (of course i got to reply this way right?)

Then she sit down, on the TV and tell me the story on what showed in the TV, commented how people act. the animation is very fantastic but i saw a rope hanging around when the female and male leads 'flying'? OMG, my headache getting more worsen when she start telling me story and tell me the animation that fantastic? ! ( Fantastic because of rope obviously seen when they 'flying') I stand up and replied, aunty, u r wrong, the animation is worst not fantastic at all. U should watch more fantastic programme (没有知识也要常看电视）

《忘记总比记得好》

我永远都相信，一个朋友对你的认识，都会反映在他送你的礼物。

有有，谢谢你。记得，六年前，我在人生中第一次面对爱情的残酷，你没有像其他人一样找我喝茶安慰我，你说你不会，你没有经验，所以送我一本，何权峰的《忘了总比记得好》

这本书，时时刻刻都在提点我。当我面对瓶颈，不能向前，也不能回头的时候，我都会翻阅这本书。

现在，我又一次面临这样的问题。有有，谢谢你，虽然你远在日本，可是你的安慰一直在我身边。